when you went

any preparation I foolishly thought I might have

no matter how perfect or imperfect we were

no matter the time lost

no matter the distance in space or heart or mind

a black hole swallowed me whole

to a place with no time

were no reason exists

regardless of circumstances

illnesses

regardless of any pain of any kind

regardless of everything that was and everything that was not

nothing compared to the torment

of the realisation that

simply

I could not get into my car and drive to your door

and be loved by you once more

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